How will you make a difference?



Photo courtesy of Unicef.org


"I have learned how to live…how to be in the world and of the world,
and not just to stand aside and watch."
- Audrey Hepburn

2011 hasn't skipped a beat since January 1st and most of us started out the year jotting down a well intentioned list of resolutions. Of course by now, many of us have also likely already forgotten or tossed out this well intentioned list of feel-good goals. Of all the things that people generally add to the list - lose weight, eat healthy, go to the gym, save money, pay off debt, travel more, find love, find a better job, etc. etc. etc...volunteering and giving back also comes up on many lists year after year. And with April's National Volunteer Week behind us and the birthday of the iconic and inspirational Audrey Hepburn coming up next week on May 4th, I thought it would be fitting to share some resources that can help you fulfill at least one of your resolutions this year.

Volunteer Locally - If you aren't sure where to start and don't know who, what, when, where and how to connect with your local nonprofits, try these 3 national volunteer search sites that can help you identify volunteer opportunities in your city based on your interests and availability:

• HandsOn Network
• Volunteer Match
• One Brick

There are also many international volunteer organizations with local chapters like Rotary International and the Association of Junior Leagues International that organizes opportunities to volunteer locally and globally.

Volunteer Abroad - For those of us who possess a travel bug and love to explore new cultures, "voluntourism" or volunteering abroad is a great way to learn about new countries, volunteer with local nonprofits or non-governmental organizations (NGO) and meet new people who share your love for travel and volunteerism. Cross Cultural Solutions is a fantastic organization that provides the expertise and resources to help you volunteer abroad in over 9 countries spread throughout the world. You might even catch yours truly on one of these trips before the year ends!

Do It While You're Young is an amazing site overflowing with resources for you to peruse for traveling, working and volunteering abroad.

If you're not convinced that volunteering is your 'thing', here are a few things to consider if doing good for the sake of doing good and the personal feel-good factor isn't enough. So here's what's in it for you and your career:

1) Gain new skills that can be applied at the workplace. Practice management and leadership skills you'd like to strengthen like team building, time management, coaching and mentoring, and interpersonal relations.

2) Currently out of a job? Volunteering is not only a noble way to spend your time in between jobs, but it is also a great way to keep your skills polished and shows potential employers you are actively applying your professional skills, and for social benefit which will help you stand out among other candidates! If you are currently employed and have a strong desire to offer your professional business skills to a nonprofit as a Pro Bono Consultant, visit Taproot Foundation and find out how you can make an invaluable contribution to a nonprofit in your community.

3) Volunteering is the new golf game. Many a business deals have been made on on the golf course, but as more and more corporations invest in social impact programs, smart businesses are finding ways to partner with key clients to build deeper rapport and relationships through mutual volunteerism projects and major community investments.

Now, get out there and 'be the change you wish to see in the world' - anyone and everyone has the ability to make a difference!

New Season, New Style!



Courtesy of Lulu's

 Ahh, after a three-month long hiatus I have rejoined the blogisphere and it feels good to be back! And at the perfect time - springtime! After all the heavy wools and boots from a long winter, I'm so ready to switch wardrobes and pull out all the fun, light and colorful fabrics of spring! And here are three spring trends you'll definitely see me wearing this season:

1) Maxi dresses - What's not to love about a maxi dress? They're fun, festive and oh, so comfy! Throw on a pair of sandals or wedges and a casual blazer with a long strand necklace and you're good to go - summer music festivals, picnics, city exploring...here we come! Asos.com has a great selection of maxi dresses online. But be mindful of the shape of the dress. Be sure it falls naturally to your curves so that you don't lose your figure and look like you're wearing a balloon.

2) Midi skirts - I love midi skirts! It's a definite throw back to the fifties and I'm diggin' it. I recently picked up a light, flowy tan midi skirt with a black waistline from H&M and have been getting rave reviews. Pair it with a tank and flats for a more casual look or dress it up work with a pair of pumps and you'll look like a total dame.

3) Nautical stripes - I'm obsessed with the nautical theme! I've picked up several fitted stretch striped tanks from Aritizia and have been practically living in them. Pair one of these tanks with a pair of loose fitting tapered khakis (roll up the hem 2-3 times) and throw on a pair of fun booties or wedges for a city hipster appeal. Add a straw fedora for good measure and you're ready to hit up any summer street fair.

There are two trends that are still going strong but I would tone it down because it's on it's way out!

1) Animal print - Please refrain from wearing the entire zoo all in one look. Leopard and zebra - they're e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e. And when you see a trend being sold all the way from Barneys down to Walmart, it's a tell tale sign it's on its way out. Rather than wear it H2T, use it like you would a pop of color - in small doses. Curb your desire to go crazy with the animal print and keep it to a demure purr rather than a ferocious-everybody-make-a-run-for-it roar.

2) Leggings - This is a trend I'd personally hate to see go because I love leggings for the ease and comfort factor. But as a stylist, I am so ready for this to be over because way too many women kill me with its improper use and abuse! Please read the following slowly and carefully - opaque tights are not the same as leggings. We can see EVERYTHING when you wear your tights as if they were leggings. NOT OKAY. This also goes for buying cheap leggings - again, we can see London, France AND your underpants. Invest in high quality leggings if you're going to wear them. And unless you have an amazing and financially insured booty like J-Lo, choose a top that covers your butt. TMI. Enough said.

Respect Is More Than Just A Song...



Courtesy of the World Wide Web

 Aretha Franklin will be the first to tell you all about R-E-S-P-E-C-T and we will proudly sing along with her at the top our lungs, just loud enough for our neighbors to wish they could tune us out. Yet most of us will likely have a somewhat diluted insight into what it really means to respect yourself and others. So let's take a quick peek at the good ol' trusty Webster's Dictionary to find out what respect means. "To consider worthy of high regard...a high or special regard...the quality or state of being..." Synonyms include "reference, regard, appreciate, consider, admire."

I don't know about you but I'm no more clearer about what respect means by those definitions than I am about seeing my own reflection in the mud. This singular definition says respect is for those who have somehow earned a certain level of achievement or regard or only reserved for those of high profile and stature. But what about everyone else? What about everyday encounters, everyday interactions between people in the various relationships we maintain? What does respect look like in those situations?

Let me take a step back and give you some background on why this topic of respect. Recently I joined a founding board of a new nonprofit called The Respect Institute headquartered in the Silicon Valley. I gravitated towards this work for several reasons, one of which I have eluded to in a prior posting. The lengths at which children and adults will go to make others feel bad for the sake of popularity, advancement or just sport is heartwrenching and painful to encounter; both as the person being picked on and also as the bystander who wants to do something but is too afraid to step up in fear of becoming another target for the terrorizer(s). In elementary and jr high school, for years I endured being told I was ugly, flat chested, flat nosed, short, and made fun for the clothes I wore because they weren't brand names. Some days I would open my backpack to find the remains of everyone's lunches from the garbage can. Another time someone stole my purse and dumped all its contents all over the girls' bathroom. Once a girl nearly drowned me in a swimming pool and laughed the entire time while I screamed bloody murder for what felt like hours before her older brother heard me and tore out of the house to pull me out. And then there were the non-stop constant crank calls at all hours of the night every night which affected my entire family.

Tell Your Truth. Know You're Valuable. Follow Your Passions. Trust Your Gut. Set Boundaries - Speak Up. Be Compassionate - Listen. Get Help. Spread Respect. These are the Respect Basics principles that The Respect Institute provides to youth, parents, educators, policymakers and organizations through their vision, tools and research. They equip individuals and organziations with the skills necessary to develop self-respect and spread respect to stop bullying, domestic violence, teen pregnancy, and discrimination and to promote healthy relationships, communication, peace and collective collaboration towards a more humane and compassionate society.

So how can you make Respect more than just a song? Make a commitment to live out and explore the Respect Basics in your own life. You can also become a Respect Ambassador and support our work by making a donation: www.therespectinstitute.org

Respect Institute's work matters because children and adults should not be treated any less than with compassion, kindness, care and respect. We need to make this a practice that occurs everyday in every interaction we have with every person we encounter, even with those who do not hold the same values or intentions we do. Hate makes our world a very ugly place but I am certain that respect and compassion will prevail.

Where to Find Your Holiday Dress Online

Courtesy of the World Wide Web

'Tis the season of chaos and mayhem at every retail venue or shopping mall as we get closer and closer to Christmas. The last thing you want to do is to brave the frontier of amateur, angst ridden, stressed out shoppers in order to find a great dress for all these impending holiday parties that have already gone underway. Nor do you want to overpay for a dress you feel might only wear once or twice for a festive occasion (although I hope that you can find different ways to dress it up and down to get the most of of your purchase). If I ever meet the person who came up with the idea of online shopping, I would not only shake their hand, I would kiss him or her on the cheek like I did once when I met Adam Brody in LA. I chalk that up to being spontaneous (I promise it wasn't champagne courage)...and lucky for me he's a very gracious guy.

Alas, I digress. Back to affordable dress shopping online. Here are some of my favorite online websites to buy great dresses without having to take out a personal loan to do so.

Lulu: www.lulus.com
I love this site. Great feminine girly dresses for less than $90 . But don't hesitate or save a dress on your wishlist too long...their inventory moves fast!

Asos: www.asos.com
Amazing UK shopping site with the latest trends from the other side of the pond. I love not only the dresses but also the accessories! The size and price search option also makes it super easy to pick up what works best for your body and budget.

Forever21: www.forever21.com
When it comes to finding something "in the moment" and affordable, F21 is my go-to online site. Shipping is free if you spend more than $75 and trust me, its easy to find at least a few items to make that happen. You can literally dress yourself H2T for under $80. What a sweet treat!

ModCloth: www.modcloth.com
This site has been around for awhile and has become one of my latest obsession. Not only are there adorable dresses but if you prefer a more vintage, retro feel, this is definitely the site for you!

BCBGeneration: www.bcbg.com
BCBG has always been a fan favorite for me for years and years when it comes to finding fabulous dresses. Of course when BCBGeneration launched, it was a total score because the price point makes it a bit easieron the wallet if you can't affore thier signature lines. You can definitely find a great dress for under $150.

Now grab a glass of wine, sit back and wait for the UPS guy to show up with your dress so you can get all dolled up for another three more weeks of holiday parties and NYE soirees! Enjoy!

Holiday Fabulosity

Courtesy of Guess Marciano

Wow. Times fly when the seasons change! Fall is officially here with Thanksgiving only a few days away. Just when I thought I was done dolling up for charity gala season, tonight I head out for the beginning of a sleuth of holiday parties. For many of us, the holidays are a festive but stressful time of year because there's so much going on. The last thing anyone wants to worry about is what to wear. With the range of parties that one might be obliged to appear at - from corporate holiday parties, to family gatherings to cocktail parties at friends' homes, manuvering in your closet to decide what to wear from event to event can get overwhelming.

For some, your natural inclination may be to resort to wearing the same outfit to every event in name of being efficient. My response: don't you dare. Not for fear of being caught wearing the same outfit twice (although for some of us, this may THE single most important thing to consider), but because I'm here to tell you today that it's not that hard to put yourself together and look festive and fabulous!

Corporate Holiday Functions: Just because a company adds "party" to the event title does not mean the rules of work attire become moot. Practice erring on the safe side versus wild side when it comes to corporate functions. Do not under any circumstance, literally bust out the "girls", wear spandex, or something inappropriately short, even if you think you can because you "look and feel young". Remember, these people will see you again on Monday morning and if your career means anything to you, you'll want them to continue to see you as a serious professional rather than the office tart. Equally important in this crowd is your behavior. For the love of Prada, please do not get wasted. Perceptions can change very quickly and stay for the long haul. Look for dresses no higher than 2-3 inches above your knees. Choose a top that keeps your cleavage a secret between you and Victoria. Tea-length, A-line LBDs with a beautiful brooch, full skirt dresses or crisp winter white slacks with a metallic top and a cute sweater, shawl or scarf would be great combinations. Feel free to play with accessories and shoes to create the drama that you want for an evening affaire.

Family Gatherings: If your family gatherings tend to be more formal, I would suggest dressing as you would to a corporate event. Unless of course, you like it when good ol' Uncle Frank checks out your rack over the turkey on the table. If your family gatherings are more casual, then jeans, boots, and a cute top with a sweater wrap and you're ready to go!

Cocktail Parties at Someone's Home: At holiday cocktail party, I would give you more license to sass it up just a bit. And this is really up to you and how well you know the host and their friends. If everyone tends to doll it up, then by all means have fun with it! There are so many great dresses this season in metallics, sparkles, royal hues, and winter whites. I love it all; just not all in one dress, so choose wisely. Remember this isn't a lounge, a club or a gala so keep it simple...if you choose to go with a sparkly top, pair it with slacks or a black skirt and a boyfriend blazer and great heels.

New Year's Eve Parties: I love New Years Eve parties. What's not to love? Guys look incredibly dashing in suits and tuxedos. Women have amazingly decadent party dresses. There's a lot of champagne and oh, there's a lot of champange! And there's the countdown when you draw the closest person to you at midnight for a kiss, whether they came with you to the party or not! I only have one rule for you to remember when dressing for NYE: Choose only one part to show off. What does this mean? If you choose to go with a dress that highlights your chest, then keep the leg and back baring to a minimum. If you choose to show off your back, keep your chest and legs tastefully covered. If you choose to go all legs, then keep everything else simple. You get the picture. The goal here is to create a fun but classy look, not a trashy one.

In general, other things to keep in mind: Don't drink and drive. If you do drink, call a town car, get a room, or have a designated driver. Always bring a small gift for the host if you're attending an event at someone's home. If you bring a date, don't forget to introduce them to everyone if they don't know anyone there. It sucks to be a plus one and be forgotten...better to show up solo if you plan to drop your plus one off at the door with your coat. Ask the host if they need any help before, during or after the event. Putting together events is a huge undertaking so even if it just means picking up after yourself, it would be a great help to the host.

And of course, eat, drink, laugh and be merry! Happy holidays!!!

The Beauty of Bucket Lists

Courtesy of the World Wide Web

Most of my life I had always had the comfort of knowing what was was coming next in my life. I was very blessed to have a stable family life and much of knowing where I was going was due to the support and guidance of my parents. Because of this, I became quite skilled at planning and liked knowing what was next. Graduate high school, go to college, meet a guy in college, graduate college, marry guy from college, start first career...check. Check. Check. Check. Check. Check. Divorce guy I married from college - cheeeeeck...wait a minute. Crap. That wasn't part of the plan!

So there I was in my mid 20s, completely off my proverbial path with no plan. If you know a planner or you are one yourself, you know how unnerving it feels for a planner to be smacked in the face with this unknown reality called AMBIGUITY. Not to know what would come next was damn near frightening. As I fumbled through the first year in this place called ambiguity, frantically trying to find where the emergency exits were, I began to slowly take in this bizarre and incredibly uncomfortable position I found myself in.

Bucket lists as we all traditionally know them to be, are reserved for the time in life when we need an assessment of everything we've done or wanted to do in life before we 'kick the bucket'. But why only use it for that purpose? And why wait until then?

So I created my own list. And rather than live the linear life that I thought I wanted and what was expected of me, I began to ever so cautiously find bits of joy in the freedom of being able to design my life in any way I wanted. It was like being given a huge empty blank canvas and being told paint anything I want. And so I did. I will never forget the first time I hailed a cab in Manhattan. And learned to enjoy eating in a restaurant at a table for one. Or when I booked my first modeling job and recieved my first paycheck. Or the first day of grad school. When I saw the Effel Tower for the first time. Or when I produced my first fashion show. And ziplined in the Costa Rican rainforests.

I am now in my early 30s and though I know I'm still young in the grand scheme of things, the past few years have been overwhelmingly abundant and exhilarating. The moment I allowed myself to accept ambiguity, it freed me to explore outside the box and ask myself, what if and why not. Bucket lists aren't about endings or about where you are in terms of years left in life. It's really about creating new beginnings and starting wherever you may be. You may have experienced a great loss like a partner or a job, but realize this is not where your story ends. It's where a new one begins. So take out a piece of paper, poster board, journal or e-pad and start your own bucket list and design your future in ways you never could imagine. You will never find a more rewarding way to plan your life.

Do You Suffer From AMGS?



Courtesy of the World Wide Web

 [enter: ambiguous voice of a prescription medication commercial]

Have you or anyone you know ever experienced any of the following symptoms?

- Made fun of strangers for their physical appearance

- Talked negatively behind a friend's back

- Played a prank on a friend in the name of humor

- Spread rumors that damaged someone's reputation

- Purposely criticized a friend to fuel their insecurities

- Demean someone's character or confidence

- Dismissed a friend's feelings

- Tormented, embarrassed or harassed a friend or stranger in public

You may also experience other symptoms such as: verbal diarhhea, inability to keep secrets, insincerity, lack of compassion and tolerance, challenges in giving others compliments, closemindedness, jealously, fear, insecurity, joy in seeing others in agony and scarcity.

If you have said yes to any of these, then you or someone you know may be suffering from AMGS - Adult Mean Girl Syndrome. It can also be known as Adult Mean Guy Syndrome, as this pyschological ailment does not discriminate between genders.

What is AMGS?

AMGS is prevalent in today's culture and can be easily found anywhere - in the workplace, among circles of friends, within families, and worst of all it is highly sensationalized in the media. From shows like the Bad Girls Club to The Housewives of 'Enter Major City Here', we see horrific displays of AMGS among women. With shows like this on the air, it's no wonder why we see so many heartbreaking stories of teen suicide due to bullying.

Let's face it, no matter how much we may think our kids can think for themselves (and many of them do), they also learn by watching what we as adults do. And if they see adults treating one another with little to no respect, guess what? They will do the same because they think if it works for us, then it must work for them.

The Cure.

Obviously there is no psychological condition called AMGS and all joking aside, women's bad behavior towards other women truly does absolutely nothing for the advancement of women in today's society. No, let's take it one step further; it does nothing for our society as a whole. If anything, it makes us look back asswards. It's disturbing that some take Darwin's concept of survival of the fittest to mean that cutting down someone's existence will make them better, if not the best, above everyone else.

So what is the cure for AMGS? Treatment and rehabilitation can include respect, kindness, compassion, empathy, humility, abundance, generosity, sincerity, tolerance, acceptance. Combatting AMGS isn't easy, but it's also not impossible. Those who know their boundaries and learn to speak up for themselves and others will not only survive AMGS but overcome it. By simply choosing not to accept AMGS in our lives, we make room to create a nurturing community of friends and family who will encourage your further development and growth.